SavageTimes

My daughter has been officially withdrawn from high school part-time. This is a GREAT thing and happened wayyyyy faster than we expected. Shout out to our home high school!!! She’s not keeping the weight on and hasn’t been able to physically make any period after 3rd for weeks. Yes, she went to Homecoming: understand she had to rest for two days prior (not go to school at all) and she was in pain for three days after. She doesn’t regret at all, but it’s not an easy path. From where I stand, she can go to school and make up credits any time. She can’t make up the social memories, and she can’t do any of it if she’s dead. So, we figure out best case scenario so she can live the best life SHE wants to live. I’d rather have her have amazing friends then get a high school diploma or go to college on time. Life, as the three of us learned five years ago, doesn’t always follow a straight line, and turns out, that’s usually better than OK.

She has asked me to put this out here because she (and I) are realizing there is not a lot of understanding of what is going on with her. She skips school but goes to homecoming….We get how it looks. She’s been doing some cool things on her Instagram account to get her followers to feel comfortable asking her questions–and she’s had some really cool conversations with some amazing teens out there; I am grateful to them and their parents for raising them with such love!!

She has an autoimmune disease that will probably settle down once she is through adolescence–we hope–but it’s not being nice to her right now. Some have suggested to me if I’ve considered if she is bipolar. The answer is YES, SHE TOTALLY IS. But not the way you think. She has great days and HORRIBLE days, totally dependent on the TSH, T3, T4 and Reverse T3 hormones infiltrating her body–yeah, all those hormones and your body’s ability to digest them totally control you, more than you know–AND how much her own white blood cells are attacking her because of the above hormones or, you know, just because. Sometimes she has amazing MOMENTS and the next moment she’s on the floor in pain. She can’t eat the way she needs to because her body is basically attacking her stomach, too, so eating is scary pain to her. She and I and her doctors also suspect she has IBS, but we can’t prove that and get meds for it until she is 16 and can get a colonoscopy (unless she starts to bleed cuz, you know, forget preventive medicine at all).

She needs to eat tiny bits and pieces all throughout the day, and WEIRD stuff, which doesn’t work so well when you’re at school all day, AND stay stress free as much as possible, because stress is not helpful to her condition.

She can walk the dog in the afternoon with a smile on her face and joy in her heart, but that doesn’t mean she is not struggling.  It just means she is LIVING and making the choice to LIVE as best she can.

She is not “fixed.” That’s something else she’s been getting. “When will you be fixed already?” And I’ve been asked, too, “So, you’ve found a cure?”

No. There is no “fixing” here. No “cure.” There are meds, which she is on, and she will get them increased as things progress. She will continue to improve. But it will be slow. More slowly than I can stand, sometimes, because I’m her mom, and I have this same disease except it’s nice to me, and I wish for anything we could trade.

But no matter how much she improves–and I have decided one day she will surpass my own good health–she will always have to be healthy, and get the right amount of exercise, and take medication, and watch her mental state. Which isn’t a bad thing at all. And what I’ve had to do for twenty five years. Just being aware and respectful of your own body isn’t really an American thing….🙂

Thank you to everyone who has already given us so much love and hugs, whether they are in person or via social media. It means so much to her (and me). ❤